I’ve never been able to get a super-clear read on my own sexual orientation, and that’s just how it is sometimes.

The War on Loneliness

11queerbadge_400 Same-sex attraction certainly exists. And it’s probably biological. But, in some ways, the existential life of the individual queer person would be easier if it wasn’t a question of biology, because then it would just be a question of taste and could be interrogated as such. We have plenty of tools for analyzing questions of taste: straight men know exactly how to say that they prefer one kind of woman to another kind of woman, and, while we don’t think of those preferences as being biological (though they might be, to some extent), we accept them as real expressions of that man’s unique psyche. Perhaps what we’re looking for is a world where some men are just able to say, “Oh, I find other men–or this kind of man–to be aesthetically satisfying in such and such a way” without any question of biology entering into it.

That, though, is not…

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Teaching as Self-Sacrifice

Math with Bad Drawings

Like everyone else, I’m heir to the prejudices of my culture. So even though I know firsthand that teaching is a profession, on some level I see it as an act of self-sacrifice, as a hard path undertaken for the greater good.

This might not sound like a prejudice. Not a damaging one, anyway. It paints a generous portrait of teaching as noble and virtuous—a useful antidote to the too-common caricature of educators as lazy, union-fed bureaucrats. This ethic of “the greater good,” in fact, helped draw many of us into the profession. What we lack in salary and prestige, we make up for in civic-mindedness, in moral conviction, in feeling we’ve taken a high road through our professional life.

But all this high-mindedness has a dark underbelly. In painting the choice to teach as an act of self-sacrifice, I believe that we may harm our schools more than we…

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Profile

Prose and Other Musings

Profile

Welcome to online dating!  Time to create your profile…

First, a little about you:

Um. Hello.  I’m a writer…which sounds unemployed...  I work as a technical writer, and I write short stories and screenplays do creative writing in my free time.  I’m a bookworm, I love authors like Hemingway, Kerouac, Tolstoy… I also read a lot.

My favorite types of music are jazz and swing.  I also love classical and opera… yeah, that’s gonna go over well.

I’m a pretty good cook, and I love to try out new recipes but most of the time I just wing it, but it usually works out… usually.

I loveenjoy really enjoy traveling.  I used to tour with a drum and bugle corps… basically a semi-pro marching band, well, sort of like a marching band, but not exactly… I’ve been on many road trips.  In the next year or two I’m…

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Stress Rhinos

Diamond Pretty Adventures

I don’t handle stress well.  Have a good laugh at that, because it was a joke.  No no, in reality it’s much, much worse than “not well”.  I react to stress the way I imagine an infant would react if he were being charged by a pack of flaming rhinos who wouldn’t halt until he solved a Rubik’s cube.  I go through my own Kubler-Ross series of emotional processing.  

disbelief 
They’re certainly not going to continue running at me.  Surely they’ll tire or get distracted or have a sudden hankering for a cheeseburger.

shock 
How are they still running?!  Don’t they realize they’re on fire?!

frustration
God damnit, I got the green, but then to get the blue, I have to ruin the green.  Who came up with this hell toy, anyway?

terror
THEY ARE NOT THAT FAR OFF AND THEY ARE STILL AFLAME

determination
I will craft…

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An Open Letter to Michele Bachmann

It Seems To Me...

Michele Bachmann suggested that the gay community is bullying Americans and politicians.  You can read the full article and hear the clip for yourself here. This is my response.

Dear Michele Bachmann,

I would like to provide you with a definition of a word that, for all your legal experience, you seem not to comprehend. The word “bully” has become a buzzword, a convenient way for adults who are losing an argument to shut down the conversation. When your back is against the wall, you call someone a “bully” and if they don’t allow you to gracefully exit the argument you get to say, “SEE! They ARE a bully.”

Except, that’s incorrect. “Bully” is defined variously as “a person who uses superior strength or power to harm, intimidate or influence those who are weaker.”

Now let’s reconsider your words. “…the gay community, they have so bullied the American people, and…

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The Cat in the Trash

Nailsbails

"Sorry, I got here first." “Sorry, I got here first.”

I’m an expert on modern decor. What, were you expecting me to say, “I’m no expert on modern decor? Why would I say that? Short of picking your nose and eating it, I don’t think there’s a faster way to get people to stop listening to you than by starting a declarative sentence with “I’m no expert, but…” That’s why I prefer to lie and say I’m an expert about every single topic of conversation. For example, at the ballet last week I turned to Wife and said, “I’m an expert on post-impressionist interpretive dance. This performance stinks.” Therefore, seeing as I am an expert on modern decor, you have no choice but to listen to me when I say the wave of the high-end furniture future is…trash cans. How do I know this? I have engineered a fool-proof system that can determine whether any…

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